Dancing with the Shadow

In the Tango of Life, we dance in and out of the roles of student and teacher, leader and follower, all with much to share - all with much to learn.

The Rabbit Hole only goes down as far as we are willing to let ourselves venture.

We are given opportunities to experience moments of true valor, recognizing that we are the heroes of our own story. We pull ourselves up out of the mire and muck and consciously choose to stand in the fire of our own evolution.

If we are ever to rise from the ashes, we must first burn.

We also have the choice, along the path; to slow down our own progress by playing it safe and shutting down to personal growth, which is perfectly understandable and necessary for “self preservation” at times.

Hiding feels comfortable; good for a while, but our issues always have a way of showing up and asking us to dance, and sooner or later, if we want change in our life experience, we will accept the invitation.

At some point we will be confronted by the darkness, which for many of us has been keeping us from living our most spectacular life.

We’ve all heard that “it takes two to tango,” and if life is a Milonga, one dance partner who has much to teach us is our own Shadow Side.

The Shadow Self has been asking me to dance for days, and I’ve been avoiding the cabaseo of familiar childhood wounds, which are demanding to be recognized and healed.

It seems much easier to avoid the pain by looking away from the shadow, than to lock eyes and move toward the mirror of self-discovery.

Carl Jung said, “That which we resist, persists,” and The Shadow Side can only be denied a dance for so long.

Eventually, if we want our lives to improve, we must deal with our own darkness.

It is easy to blame others when things go awry. We can point, accuse and blame, but at the end of the day, if we want our lives to improve, we must acknowledge the role we have played in the unfolding of our own story.

The victim archetype is persistent in its demand to be heard, and for years, I identified with the role. It was easy, since I felt “victimized” as a child.

There was abuse, which colors the way I view the world, and there were bright and shining moments that contribute to my joi de vie. I think this must be true for everyone.

To confront the shadow side is to loosen the grip of our internal cogs and move more freely into our best life, but the only way to do this is acknowledge the cabaseo, bravely take The Shadow's hand, and accept the invitation to dance.